Learn “Ketaohua” Mandarin is very important for building relationship in China

Recently, the island Taiwan has become a popular tourist attraction because of its food, culture, and beautiful scenery. Taiwan is also chosen as one of the most livable places in the world due to its safety, convenience and hospitality. Foreign tourists are amazed at how friendly Taiwanese are. If you get lost and ask the locals, they will not only show you the way but will even take you to the destination. No matter where you are, you can always hear the local people say “please”, “thank you”, and “I’m sorry”. No wonder people say that the most beautiful scenery in Taiwan is the local people.

However, what we said above might be just an illusion if you have a deeper understanding of Chinese culture. According to Confucianism, social harmony is the most important thing, and etiquette is the foundation of society. So we talk politely to avoid conflicts and promote social harmony. In Chinese, we call these polite words “Kètàohuà” (客套話). So what Taiwanese tell you is likely to be just “Kètàohuà”, not sincere words. In fact, it’s very important to know the usage of “Kètàohuà” if you want to have a good relationship with Chinese or Taiwanese people.

The first thing about “Kètàohuà” is to praise each other. You must show your respect and admiration to people by praising them. For example, when you visit a customer’s home, you must praise him for his beautiful house and good decor. If he has children, you also have to praise his children for being smart. By the way, don’t forget to praise his pet if he has one.

The second thing about “Kètàohuà” is to show your humility. In Chinese culture, humility is the greatest virtue so a proud and arrogant man can not be respected here. When you praise people, you also have to express your humility properly. For example, when you praise your customer’s house, don’t forget to ask him about the designer. When you praise his children, don’t forget to ask him about the educational methods. By doing so, people will think that you are easy to talk to and welcome you unsuspectingly.

For Chinese people, human relations are good investments. If you have good relationships with your customers, then problems will no longer be problems. You might feel sad when you understand the culture of “Kètàohuà”. Those beautiful words you have heard from local people may not be true. But Confucius also said, “Fine words and an insinuating appearance are seldom associated with true virtue.” “Kètàohuà” is just a way for building relationships. But for building a friendship, there are still many things to do besides “Kètàohuà”.

学会「客套话」将有利于融入华人社会

最近,台湾这座岛屿因为美食、文化和美景而变成一个热门景点。台湾也被选为是世界上最适宜居住的地方之一,因为这里安全、方便,又有人情味。外国旅客对台湾人的友善感到惊艳。如果你迷路了,然后向当地人问路,他们不但会告诉你方向,甚至干脆就载你一程。不管在何处,你总是能够听见当地人说「请」、「谢谢」、「对不起」。无怪乎人们说,「台湾最美的风景,是人」。

不过,以上所述或许只是假象,如果你更深入了解中国文化的话。根据儒家思想,社会和谐是最重要的事情,而礼节就是社会的基础。所以我们说话很有礼貌,是为了要避免冲突和促进社会和谐。在中文里面,我们把这些礼貌话称为「客套话」。所以台湾人对你说的很可能只是「客套话」,而不是真心话。事实上,如果你要和中国人或台湾人打好关系,说「客套话」是很重要的。

说「客套话」的第一步是要称赞对方。你必须要用称赞来表示你对对方的尊重和景仰。比方说,当你去拜访客户的家时,你一定要称赞他的家很漂亮,装潢很好。如果他有小孩,也要称赞他的小孩很聪明。最后,如果他有宠物的话,也不要忘记顺便称赞一下。

说「客套话」的第二步是要表示谦虚。在中国的文化中,谦虚是最重要的美德,所以一个骄傲自大的人在这里是得不到任何敬重的。当你称赞别人时,也要适当地表示一下谦虚。例如,当你称赞客户的房子时,别忘了向他请教设计师的事。当你称赞他的孩子时,别忘记向他讨教教育方法。这样子,对方会认为你很好相处,毫无戒心地欢迎你。

对中国人来说,人际关系是项好投资。如果你和客户有好关系,问题就不是问题了。在你了解「客套话」的文化之后,或许你会难过,你从当地人听到的那些漂亮话或许不是真的。不过,孔子也说,「巧言令色鲜矣仁。」「客套话」只是建立人际关系的工具。而要建立一段友谊,光靠「客套话」是不够的,还有很多事情要做。

學會「客套話」將有利於融入華人社會

最近,台灣這座島嶼因為美食、文化和美景而變成一個熱門景點。台灣也被選為是世界上最適宜居住的地方之一,因為這裡安全、方便,又有人情味。 外國旅客對台灣人的友善感到驚豔。如果你迷路了,然後向當地人問路,他們不但會告訴你方向,甚至乾脆就載你一程。不管在何處,你總是能夠聽見當地人說「請」、「謝謝」、「對不起」。無怪乎人們說,「台灣最美的風景,是人」。

不過,以上所述或許只是假象,如果你更深入了解中國文化的話。根據儒家思想,社會和諧是最重要的事情,而禮節就是社會的基礎。所以我們說話很有禮貌,是為了要避免衝突和促進社會和諧。在中文裡面,我們把這些禮貌話稱為「客套話」。所以台灣人對你說的很可能只是「客套話」,而不是真心話。事實上,如果你要和中國人或台灣人打好關係,說「客套話」是很重要的。

說「客套話」的第一步是要稱讚對方。你必須要用稱讚來表示你對對方的尊重和景仰。比方說,當你去拜訪客戶的家時,你一定要稱讚他的家很漂亮,裝潢很好。如果他有小孩,也要稱讚他的小孩很聰明。最後,如果他有寵物的話,也不要忘記順便稱讚一下。

說「客套話」的第二步是要表示謙虛。在中國的文化中,謙虛是最重要的美德,所以一個驕傲自大的人在這裡是得不到任何敬重的。當你稱讚別人時,也要適當地表示一下謙虛。例如,當你稱讚客戶的房子時,別忘了向他請教設計師的事。當你稱讚他的孩子時,別忘記向他討教教育方法。這樣子,對方會認為你很好相處,毫無戒心地歡迎你。

對中國人來說,人際關係是項好投資。如果你和客戶有好關係,問題就不是問題了。在你了解「客套話」的文化之後,或許你會難過,你從當地人聽到的那些漂亮話或許不是真的。不過,孔子也說,「巧言令色鮮矣仁。」「客套話」只是建立人際關係的工具。而要建立一段友誼,光靠「客套話」是不夠的,還有很多事情要做。

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